“Stop annoying hiccups in seconds.
Safe and simple to use for adults and children.
The Hicural Hiccup Stick is the world’s first tool that instantly stops hiccups. Simply place horizontally in the mouth, gently bite down and drink a cup of water. It’s safe and simple to use for adults and children.
Convenient carrying case.
Made in U.S.A.”
SkyMall sells a lot of products, and I often find myself accompanying them with descriptions that contain a few ‘questionable’ claims and promises.
Will I admit that my descriptions occasionally include a white lie or two? Yes. Are they sometimes a bit misleading? Yes. Do I lure bumbling customers into a gray area of truth by promising them hairbrushes that will make them smarter or sunglasses that will increase their libido? Well, yes and yes.
But truly, nothing makes this job more worthwhile than when I get to outright lie.
Meet the Hiccup Stick. For 20 dollars, I will sell you three eight-inch sticks that, when placed horizontally in your mouth (the vertical and vomit inducing straight-in models will be coming out next fall,) magic away hiccups. How does it work? So simply that I won’t even bother to explain!
You may be asking yourself, what separates the astonishing Hicural Hiccup Stick from say, an ordinary, run of the mill stick? Exactly twenty dollars and your soul-crushing but lucrative naivety.
But the best part of the Hiccup Stick is that, in the winter 2012 edition of SkyMall, it is advertised directly above an emergency door seal for house-fires. Say what you want about SkyMall customers, but they’re nothing if not trusting.
BOOBS ARE LITERALLY LUMPS WITH SMALLER LUMPS ON TOP WHAT IS SO SEXUALLY ATTRACTIVE ABOUT A LUMP!!!!
What is sexually attractive about any human body part really? Penises are just tubes with lumps connected to them. Asses are also just lumps. Your face is just a collection of different types of lumps and there’s a hole on it. Everything is just a lump. I can’t get off to this. Now, a rhombus, that’s something I could fuck the shit out of.
if we got all the cats in the world to meow at exactly the same time how loud would it be
Well the average cat meow is like 65/75dB (above speaking volume but below shouting) and there are about 2bn cats in the world, so, by that math, 130-150bn dB. Which is about 100 million jets taking off at once.
Don’t let that image fool you. Click on the video; you won’t regret it.
(You’ll probably also shed a few tears at the end.)
AHHHHHHHHH. So good!
See this, THIS is how adult education and illiteracy should be in real life.
People being kind, supportive, encouraging, not mocking because you took a little longer to learn something.
I’m sorry I get really emotional about people learning and education and I’m crying really hard right now because I really wish this was a commercial for a adult education network/organization that was becoming mainstream and commonplace and celebrated and not about alcohol
This is a beautiful commercial. Even though it is a commercial for alcohol, it hands down beats the usual marketing devices for such products.
this is fucking fantastic
I’M NOT CRYING YOU’RE CRYING
you know I used to be a person who did not cry at things?
NOT TRUE ANYMORE.
jeez. watch this.
omg I’m making meowing noises because I’m trying not to cry right now wtf haha
I scoffed at first, but now I’m a puddle.
Happy Valentine’s Day!
I really hope you can appreciate the blood sweat and tears that went into finishing this by the 14th. Painting the same thing 16 times is.. fatiguing. But I’m pretty happy with the result, so I guess it was worth it. It was very experimental mixing my portrait painting with animation. I may do more in the future but if so they will definitely have less frames cause damn. Also this is actually a bit bigger, you can see the full size here (x).
Also you can see a step by step here (x).
Catlateral Damage is a first person mischievous cat simulator, where your objective is to knock as many of your loving owners belongings onto the floor within a 2 minute time limit.
It’s a fun little game, and there’s a lot of satisfaction to be had from knocking things over and making a mess (That’s probably why cats do it in the first place). The dev plans to add more levels (rooms) to destroy, but at the Alpha gives you free reign to destroy your owners bedroom for 2 mins. On your marks… get set… destroy!!
Video games in 2014 are off to a fucking phenomenal start